Melissa and Meryl with their son, Eli |
After dating for six
months and relocating to Cleveland, Melissa and Meryl Soto-Schwartz had a
ceremony in 1997 at the Cleveland Heights Civic Center. Then while on vacation
in Vermont in 2000, they had a civil-union ceremony at a library. In 2011, they
also had a wedding in front of Niagara Falls with their then-10-year-old son,
Eli, as witness in the hopes they could receive some form of legal protection
for their family. We spoke to them about the importance of marriage equality
and what it means for them now that both mothers have joint-custody of their
son.
Melissa: I never
thought I could get married, or even find a lifetime partner much less anything
like this. We’ve been fighting for so long and to know our son and our whole
family is validated and recognized and not at risk is the most incredible
feeling. No one can come in and break us up in any way, shape or form, and we
won’t be denied anything. Until you’re at the mercy of the law, you don’t know
what that’s like. To finally have the highest court in the land say, “You can’t
deny these people these rights,” it’s incredible. You are finally recognizing
my full humanity.
Meryl: I’m going
to be able to legally adopt Eli. Since we’re considered a legally married
couple by the state of Ohio and the federal government, I don’t have to worry
about that. It’s a new landscape. Because of the huge amount of public
attention to these issues, there is nobody in America who is not aware that
there are same-sex couples among us, same-sex couples who have all of the
rights of the law. Knowing that we are married has a huge psychological boost. What
allows me to adopt Eli at this point is that I’m married to his biological
mother. So, the process will be the same as for a stepparent adoption. Now, of
course, I am not Eli’s stepparent, I am simply his mother. But in the end, it
won’t matter. In the end, my name will be on a new birth certificate and he
will have two mothers, and that will be that. — as told to James Bigley II
1 comment:
Thank you for writinng this
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