Film Fest: Market Crash

Attending the Cleveland International Film Festival is an adventure. Inherent in adventures are risks.

For example, if you take a wild plunge into the stock market, you may hook up with Bill Gates in the startup days of Microsoft; however, you may also sign up with Bernie Madoff toward the end of his Ponsi scam. If you go on an African safari, you may return with wonderful memories and ancient artifacts or an exotic foot fungus.

The Market - A Tale of Trade falls into the Bernie and fungus column. A movie like this is dangerous territory for first-time attendees, because if this is your first experience at the film festival, it may well be your last.

The film started very slowly, then slowed down. The Turkish setting was more despressing than your 401(k). The glacial pace had zero drama.

The plot was nonexisitant, with just a hint of a story about smuggling some medicine for a hospital (it did not help to have the valuable medicine look like a refilled 7-up bottle). The expressionless protagonist basically drove around ugly cities in a beat-up red pick up looking for things to trade. Occasionally, he climbed out of the truck to get drunk.

Through the years, many of the films at the film festival that I did not like managed to entertain me on some level. I can amuse myself with the landscape, the film techology, the exotic language or countless other sideroads. However, The Market – A Tale of Trade, did not give me much to work with.

— Bob Carson

Friday, March 20, 4:40 p.m.; Saturday, March 21, 2:10 p.m. Germany, UK, Turkey, Kazakhstan, Subtitles, 93 minutes

Film Fest: Jack Sparrow Lives

A good band of pirates will always kidnap the hearts of film lovers. From Errol Flynn to Johnny Depp, swashbucklers pack theaters. We know we shouldn’t, but we love mayhem on the high seas.

This documentary features environmental pirates chasing commercial pirates. It’s quite a chase —and quite a battle when they meet. At the Edge of the World is a riveting voyage.

Two ships set out for Antarctica with one mission: Stop the poaching of whales by Japanese hunters posing as researchers using whatever guerilla-style tactics it takes. The ships spend 50 grueling days and nights on the unforgiving, yet beautiful, Ross Sea searching for whales and illegal whalers. The filmmaker, Dan Stone, captures it all as they endure danger, loneliness, seasickness, brutal cold, icebergs, confrontation and perhaps some second thoughts about their mission.

And they should have doubts, the task is very dangerous and the results are difficult to measure. We (and they) spend time considering whether or not what they are doing is worth the danger. Are their tactics the best way to save whales?
This film does so many things so well. Gorgeous cinematography, much of it aerial, is used to show a rarely visited world. Questions are posed that are difficult to answer as we are put into the parkas and rubber boots of interesting people. I have little doubt that At the Edge of the World will captivate audiences and become one of the favorites at this year’s festival.

As you exit the theater, you might turn to your partner and ask about ends justifying the means, or the boundaries of justice. This crew of eco-warriors goes overboard – literally.

Go with them. — Bob Carson

At the Edge of the World. Friday, March 20, 6:45 p.m.; Saturday, March 21, 11:00 a.m. Antarctica, Australia, USA - 92 minutes

Film Fest opening night: I won't tell the secret

The man on the right, Mike Cram, is brilliant. After endless failed inventions, he thought of one brilliant one. A small thing. But you probably know it. And you probably like it. Probably especially if you're a guy.

Then Mike decided to write a screenplay about himself and his crazy business partner. The guy in the center, Greg Goodell, wrote a book about making movies, and Mike read it and liked it and got Greg to executive-produce his movie. The guy on the left, Dallas Roberts, plays Mike in the movie, Lightbulb, which was tonight's opening-night film at the Cleveland International Film Festival.

I won't tell you what Mike's invention was, because that would spoil the movie's surprise, and it'd just a be a movie about _____, not a fun movie full of likable characters, a buddy movie about two friends who are great and awful for each other, and a movie about a guy whose wife knows his faults and can't stand them anymore. And if Lightbulb finds a distributor, and the movie comes back to Cleveland, you should go see it.

But if you want to know what the invention is -- spoiler alert! -- click here.

Film Festival: Try It, You'll Like It

Remember when you discovered something slightly exotic, extremely interesting and great fun, but when you attemped to introduce this new passion to friends they looked at you as if you were unstable? (Sushi, let’s say.) You wait until the next time you meet, and revisit the subject with another plea. Finally, the person attempts to shut you up by mumbling that they might give it a try. But they don’t. So you shrug and give up.

Unfortunately, I continue to pester. This annoying persistence is a possible explanation for my incredibly shrinking list of friends on MySpace. Nevertheless, six years after my original journey to the Cleveland International Film Festival, some of you must be listening: Attendance was at a near record last year despite a blizzard and water main break.
But if you're still a holdout, here are four good reasons to go (besides I might stop pestering you).

Free and convenient parking. Park your car below Tower City; get your ticket validated at the Film Fest desk and drive out anytime you want. Give me free, convenient, downtown parking, and I will watch slush melt, a Yoko Ono concert or a lecture on fruit fly migration. Make me pay to park and I will not even meet Halle Berry for coffee.

It’s an adventure. When you attend films such as “The Wedding Crashers” or “Die Hard 9,” you know what you're getting after the 20 minutes of trailers. You likely have seen the majority of this feature in previous promos. It is possible you could write this movie. However, when the lights go down on “Serbian Franco Mondo La Faollies de Garu” you will be surprised. Often the surprise will be positive, occasionally the very opposite, but you will exit the theater feeling like a sophisticated scamp.

Foreign films don't include LeBron. Film Festival movies rarely have the staples of traditional American cinema: beautiful, recognizable actors. Modern movies are edited to allow a maximum of .07 seconds per scene, lest the viewer lose attention. Many movies come with a loud soundtracks that cue the viewer what to feel with the subtlety of a LeBron James dunk. In most festival films, you find performers so physically normal that you leave feeling like Brangelina. You will see homes and countries that will inspire you to kiss your front door. (You might even see something from your homeland, since the festival has a strong selection of films from Central and Eastern Europe.) The pacing will be slower, the packaging less slick. One caveat: You may be required to read and to think, impediments to some film fans.

It’s easy. Look on the Web site and select a film (there are 140 features and 177 shorts, including eight films by or about Clevelanders). Drive (or take the RTA) to Tower City, park your car, report to the Film Fest desk for the blessed parking ticket validation ceremony. Get your movie ticket. Go to movie. Repeat as necessary.
And you didn’t even have to eat raw fish.

— Bob Carson

(Check out our blog daily for previews of upcoming films playing at the 33rd Cleveland International Film Festival.)

Beyond Popcorn

If you like movies- and most of us do- then you’ll be downtown along with me and thousands of others, as often as possible during the 33rd Cleveland International Film Festival , March 19-29. Among the many films I want to see this year, there are a few that attract me because food plays a supporting or a starring role: Apron Strings, Chefs Special, The Garden, Poly Cultures: Food Where We Live, and HomeGrown: The 21st Century Farm.

And while I know from years past that stuffing myself with images and ideas is truely satisfying, I realize that I will also need more traditional forms of sustenance too- the kind that comes in a bowl, a plate, and a glass. The most practical solution is to visit restaurants that are in and around Tower City. That way I leave the car parked, walk to and from my dining destination- getting a much needed between movie stretch- and do not waste precious time that could be better spent in a darkened theater.

The Festival folk have partnered up with a few places that are offering discounts. Information about those can be found here . I did a little research of my own and came up with some other appetizing deals. Mortons celebrating the start of its 20th year in town is offering specially priced beer, wine, cocktails in lounge along with upscale and make your mouth water $ 5Bar Bites like petite filet mignon sandwiches; and crab, spinach and artichoke dip. Available 5:30-7 pm, and 9 PM to closing, every day, along with the original prime sirloin burger that made them famous 30 years ago for just $15.

At Muse in The Ritz Carlton, there’s a prix fixe Independent Film Industry menu from 5:30-7:30 pm. $28 gets you a salad, dessert and one of four entrees. I’m a fan of Chef Timothy Maxin and so I know the food will be a treat. Lola has $30, three course Happy Hour special too and the prospects for deliciousness are also a sure thing.

Finally....Car-Free

OK, so I know it's been a year since I wrote about going car-free in Cleveland. Since I wrote the story, so many people ask: Sell your car yet?

Finally, I can say yes.

As of this weekend, I will be relying on RTA and CityWheels to cart me around.

Letting go of my car keys this time feels nothing like the last time. I have been a regular rider of the bus and Rapid for more than a year. I know it can be done. And I think it will work in my lifestyle. I may opt to pick up a beater eventually, but I'm hoping I can make car-free work for me long-term. It can be done in Cleveland.

Singles Update: Coming Together

Our February cover girl Melissa Mack wanted to meet all the other sexy singles we selected for our annual issue so she organized a get-together at the House of Blues' Foundation Room last night for everyone (and let us tag along to take in all the action). 

Twelve of the 20 singles showed up anxious to learn a little bit about each other, pose for some pics (see above) and get the scoop on their dating lives (Melissa Barber revealed that she has been on a few dates with a guy she used to ride the school bus with when she was 14). 

There was even a little grumbling about how some of their photo shoots and articles turned out (it's okay, we can take the criticism). Michael Goulis expressed some uncertainty for our picture selection of him in a wife-beater (hey, we wanted to show off his cool tattoos!) and Mike Minnick was saddened by the fact that he was the last single featured in the magazine. 

Kathryn Eyring (the self-proclaimed grandma of the group) brought an issue of the magazine for everyone to autograph as they all shared a meal, laughs and emails to stay updated on how everyone is doing with being single (or not) in Cleveland.